a thing called ragging

letme make a thing clear....
i m a 1st year engineering student at one of the most reputed colleges in india...
and the thing called ragging is infact a proven medium to map the bonds of respect and affection among seniors and juniors....
so it should be infact taken in a sportive maner rather than putting on shitted out complaints against our elders...

There was a recent write up stating that ragging was detected in a women’s college. The writer was shocked. How can girls rag? Why not?
A bully need not be a male only. Anyone who is aggressive and loves to target those who are less capable of handling themselves, can be a bully. This applies to both men and women. Ragging was reported mostly from men’s college, so the fact that girls too can bully was not taken notice of. In this women’s college, a young girl was made to dance naked and she felt so humiliated, she quit.
Who is a bully? Why does someone take to bullying? Bullying habits start from childhood, so one can easily identify these young bullies. And if they are addressed while young, this habit can be nipped in the bud.
A young child who witnesses violence at home, will grow up thinking to get one’s needs satisfied, one has to resort to violence. It boils down to survival of the fittest, and if violence opens doors, then that style is adopted. A home where the parents are forever shouting, abusing each other and the children, and where addiction of some sort is present, will give rise to children who will not mind bullying tactics. They will consider it normal to bully and get their way.
Also those children who do not get love and attention at home can resort to bullying. Through democratic parenting, children can be taught to own responsibility and to respect others and their property. When such parenting is lacking, there is no one to guide, then the children will grow up with no respect for people or social rules. And this can happen to boys as well as girls.
Many children have difficulty controlling their impulses. And when such behavior patterns are not observed and rectified, then these children can turn into bullies. I happened to visit the juvenile home some time back. There I met a young boy, in his teens who had got into trouble because of his immaturity. He appeared very soft, shy and someone who can be taken for a ride. Apparently he had interfered in an adults’ quarrel which ended in him being the cause of a man’s death. It did not seem to strike him he was the cause of a person’s death, he was that immature.
Then there are those who love attention. And even negative attention is craved for. They wish for other children to look up to them, feel like some heroes and bask in hero worship. For them appearing hip will be to pick on someone and control that person.
Bullies generally tend to pick on those who will not retaliate. They do not wish to appear not capable, and their victims will be either younger than them or physically weak. And bullying is a determined act. It is not accidental or spur of the moment, bullies select their victims and bring about control over them.
When a child is observed displaying bullying habits, he/she has to be counseled. He/she may lack individual attention, either from parents or from school authorities. The parents have to be counseled on the negative consequences of bullying and they have to be shown the benefits of responsible parenting.
Also when such children do not see any visible monitoring happening, then they will indulge in this behavior without qualms. They can also be egged on by others and sometimes they are manipulated by vested interests. They being immature, can easily fall into such traps.
Ragging in educational institutions has become a criminal offense. If the students indulge in ragging they can be arrested and their future can become a question mark. So the negative consequences of ragging or bullying will have to be pointed out to them apart from showing them positive behavior.
Such children crave attention. And when the adults compliment or appreciate their good behavior and ignore their negative behavior, changes in behavior can be expected. They will have to be mentored closely and given good role models to follow. Involving them in some sort of community service will also help.
Their excess energy can be diverted in physical activities and they can be encouraged to participate in contact sports. Ridiculing them or shunning them will not yield results. It is their behavior that has to be ignored, not them.
If it is guidance they need, it can be provided. Some children come from broken homes, or from homes where one or both parents suffer some pathology. Such children do not know acceptable behavior. Here the educational institutions can extend a helping hand.
Bullies are not born so, only circumstances make them bullies. Unless they suffer from some pathology themselves, their behavior is mostly learned. And so the behavior can be unlearned. They need to be counseled and they also need our empathy. It is not only the victims that need help, even bullies do. It will be tough, but when the problem is detected early, positive results with counseling can be expected.